OK, the exciting subject of Toilets !

Yeah, I know, Toilets ? Why do we want to read about toilets ? Well over here, toilets are quite different from western styles. While most newer building have incorporated the western style of toilet, the most common is still the "squatter." HUH ? Squatter ? WTF is that ? Easier than explaining is showing.

Just as it sounds, you squat, not sit on it. Now this poses a problem for westerners such as myself. To squat straight down, flat footed, with only the walls to give you some sense of balance.. Also, flushing with toilet paper is highly discouraged, so there is usually a wastebasket full of , yup, you know it, well used TP. Therefore many bathrooms aren't the "freshest" smelling places. Now just the difficulty of trying to use this when you are sober is hard enough. When you are toasted and spinning around, it is damn near impossible to do.

This picture finely demonstrates the art of squatting !

Note that it is a normal toilet, yet they make special platforms so you can still squat. Maybe it's more hygienic. Your ass isn't touching a seat someone Else's ass has touched ! Either way, I have become like the Shit-brick in American Pie. No matter the discomfort, it's gotta wait til I get home !

Now squatters are the most common toilets not only in Korea, but in most of Asia. Whether you are going to China, Japan, Thailand or so on, be prepared to use these.

Now in Thailand, they use the same kind of squatters, however, most do not have a flushing system. You pour in water and let gravity take care of the rest.

In this picture, you can hold onto the water faucet and the ashtray for balance. Yeah, appealing thought there huh ! In my house in Thailand, upstairs off the master bedroom, I have a normal bathroom with a normal toilet and a bathtub. Downstairs though the main bathroom is a squatter. This is what most Thais in the country are the most comfortable using.

Now, in Thailand, whether you are right handed or left handed doesn't matter. Whenever you eat, you always use your right hand to eat with. The left hand is considered "unclean." Usually you will find no TP in these bathrooms. After you have assumed your best Kung Fu master stance and taken care of business, you actually use your bare left hand to wipe with. God's honest truth. Then you clean it as best you can under the faucet. So if you see someone chowing down with their left hand, DON'T EAT THAT FOOD !  This is why I always carry TP with me anywhere I go. It's stashed in my truck and under the seat of my motorcycle too.

The upside for men in Korea, is that you are pretty much free to urinate where ever you please in public. I see it ALL the time. The cops even walk past and don't say anything. So whether it's legal or they're just apathetic I don't know.

One other thing about public bathrooms in Asia, they are VERY public. Many being uni-sex. One time standing at a urinal here in Korea, This little hottie comes in behind me, and goes into the stall next to me...At first I am thinking, "Cool, Korean, sexy and not too shy !" Then she cuts loose like she has been on a steady diet of kimchi and Mexican water and Montezuma is a very pissed man. So I forgot all about her and was trying to finish as fast as I possible. The sound was grossing me out big time......Then the small hit, Jesus, Joseph and Mary ! I ended up getting out with a minor wet spot on the front of my jeans, from missing out on the proper amount of shakes.

Also, you will often be standing there and the cleaning woman will come in and start cleaning away. Sometimes she will even start talking with you !  And you know you've been here too long when you start talking back to her. I have one last pic to share with you. My favorite.